aloha every day

aloha every day

Friday, November 5, 2010

Blue Day

I wore blue today.
Not just because it is my favorite color to wear,
but because this man passed away:
Someone somewhere organized for people to wear blue today in his memory.

It was the least I could do. 

I've honestly never mourned someone that I've actually never met as I am mourning him.
I've had the absolute pleasure of watching him surf many times...just one of the glories of living in Hawai'i nei.
Those memories will live with me forever.

I've wondered in the last few days whether my sadness is sincerely in mourning, or if I am channeling my exhaustion from being so overly busy into a more "acceptable" cause.  But no, I am truly sad over his death.

And so I'm left thinking about life, and death, and the phrase "carpe diem".  I wish, more than anything that I lived my every minute with that thought in mind, but I don't.  I can't.  I have to plan for the next event, day, lesson, project.  My schedule reflects my priority to make sure I am "prepared" for what comes next.  Monday night, I have to prep for Tuesday.  Tuesday day, I have to prep material for Tuesday night....and the pattern continues.  I am not the only person dependent on this...students, coworkers, bosses, etc are dependent on my planning, as well.

Yet, I can't help but end back where I began.  How can I live for the day?  Death always reminds us that we are living.  Is that the lesson?

Andy, we miss you, and always will.


bherm27 said...

You do what you do because you are one of the few people around who care about helping others. You're an amazing teacher sis, your kids are lucky to have you, as are each and every persons who's life you touch... such as me ;) Keep planning, and they'll keep learning

sarahlove said...

I think you're right. Death is such a great reminder that we are very much alive.